So, far I have signed and dated and placed in an envelope ready-to-mail the listing agreement for the house AND called the tax guy with my social and address so we can get a tax ID for the trust.
I hate doing this stuff. It makes me sad.
Also, this morning, I have been thinking about Christmas. Do you remember that top I made to wear with those Christmas plaid pants that I LOVED? And that buffalo plaid full circle skirt that I should have worn with a cute top to show off the nipped waistline but instead wore with a slouchy red sweater because it was 1984 and I was all about slouchy. I guess I have never really given up on the slouchy look, did I?
I used to sit in the middle of the living room floor with my sewing machine and sew while I watched TV. Sitting on the floor is still my preferred position while making things but I can get a little uncomfortable these days with my baby belly. I suppose I should be more aware of sitting up straight as well but I just feel so comfortable sitting on the floor with all of my stuff spread out around me.
Sewing is also something I miss. Designing my own "patterns" and making such oddly unflattering clothing was so fun for me. I think, though, that my tendency toward geometric forms might have suited a less angular girl than myself but I still liked everything I made.
I have been thinking about you a lot... but not crying as much. Which is good and bad, I guess. Crying is such the full face pass-time and leaves me with such red eyes but I feel sort of better afterward. I think. Actually, I'm not sure how to name what I feel after crying but I don't consider it wholly negative.
I miss you, mom. It's so easy to imagine you sitting in the blue velvet chair right now... with your cozy sweater on... and your two hats because it is so cold here... reading your Palm or talking to J... it's so easy to remember you and that's better than crying... but sometimes a lot more painful.
Love,
Nicole
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